historize

Title: At the Olympics
Warnings: Nothing. Just me being stupid.
Event: Afterwards and allusions to the WORLD CUP

"Damn, burn, Russia."

"It was a ridiculous claim but one I will stand by."

"Forty medals. I didn't even hit forty medals."

"I know. I am well aware."

America laughed. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry, Russia! Just--I would totally feel, you know, understanding towards Pleshenko and stuff but he just--threw a fucking temper tantrum! I mean, really!"

"America, I'd be careful about cockiness were I you. When the World Cup comes this summer, you will sing a very different tune." England was lifting his tea cup.

America shook his head and looked at Canada, giving him a definite, See, I told you, look. He looked back at England. "Canada wins the most Golds ever at a Winter Olympics. And I win the most medals ever. If we were any other two countries, we would be allowed to be as arrogant as we wanted. But because Canada hosted and I'm--fucking me, of course--we can't. You guys can't wait to tell me how fat and stupid I am but who wins Nobel Prizes? Who wins Olympic medals? Me. And my people wanna win precisely because we get insulted so much."

"Well, you turned that around," France said, waving a hand to diffuse the situation. "You are traditionally quite weak at the Winter Olympics but you did fantastic."

America winked at Canada. "You know why that is?" He sat back, took a drink of his coffee. "Because my people got sick and tied of hearing about how much everyone thinks we suck. You know why I'm usually shit at the World Cup? Because my people don't give a shit about soccer--"

"Football."

"Shut up," America said, pointing at England. "You know what, England. You better hope to God that my people never get serious about soccer. Because we'll sweep the World Cup and you'll hate me for it. So enjoy it while you can."

England straightened his back. "I beg your pardon." But he looked serious. England was a football hooligan, after all, tried and true.

"You heard me. This summer. You and me, old man. You and me."



Notes: Just before the Winter Olympics started, Russia declared that they would take 40 medals. That's a ridiculous number. And particularly embarrassing because Russia only came away with 15.

America, on the other hand, got 37 medals--the most in any Winter Olympics (in which America is usually weak) and Canada got 14 golds, which is the most golds for any single country in the Winter Olympics.

Pleshenko is the Russian skater who won Silver. He lost to an American and he threw a temper tantrum about it. Making everyone else roll their eyes.


The World Cup this summer is set with an extremely interesting game. England vs America. They've only played each other one other time in the 50s and everyone expected America to lose. And so everyone was very surprised when America won.


So I apologize for how arrogant this might have sounded. That's usually not my thing but I'm letting a little Alfred-pride come through.

Title: At the Olympics
Warnings: Nothing. Just me being stupid.
Event: Womens Hockey


The buzzer went off. The Gold Medal Women's Hockey game was over.

Canada had won.

"Son of a bitch," America snapped his fingers but he smiled. His women still had a world-class team.

Canada grinned. "Every time, America. You never beat me. Whenever you play me, you always end up second."

"There's still the mens game!" He jumped up and stood on the concrete divider. "Hell yeah! Y'all still got the silver! Woooo! The men will avenge you! Wooo!" He jumped down, pointing at Canada. "They will, by the way." He threw a smile at Finland. "Sorry Finland. I wanna win today bad so my men can avenge my women."

"You know, in Utah--"

"Shut up! It's gonna happen!"

Finland and Slovakia looked at each other.

Title: At the Olympics
Warnings: Nothing. Just me being stupid.
Event: Figure skating. And hot men

Poland jumped up. "Omigod~! Who is that! Johnny Weir! America!"

America was deep in conversation with Canada. Discussing Hockey. Which was manly. Yeah. He surfaced. "What?"

Poland had jumped up. He was wearing bright red leggings and a fluffy white sweater dotted with sequins at the cuffs and brown leather boots trimmed in fur. He was holding onto the railing, bouncing. "Look at him! He's one of yours right?"

America looked and smiled. "Oh yeah. Johnny's a real crowd pleaser, they love him--"

"His costume is fabulous! Omigod, America. Where does he get them! He is working that--look at the tassels and the sheer layer over the hands! And the ribbon!" Poland threw his hands up, looking starstruck. "I just want to take him home with me--we could trade clothes! He's fabulous!"

Lithuania put his forehead in his hand, looking down.

"Oooomigod!" Poland squealed. "Did you see that triple-toe combination! Oh my God, guys! Holy shit! Does anyone have any roses! I need to give him roses, like, STAT!"

"The program isn't over yet," Lithuania reminded him.

"I don't even care, duh!"